First Birthday Party

Knowing this little boy is so much more than I could have ever imagined.  And 12 months flew by and there we were with the high chair, balloons and cake…and here is this sweet little boy who hid his face as a room full of people sang "Happy Birthday" while I held the cake.

I totally get you son.  I often want to put my head down when things are just too much!  As soon as the singing was done, he popped up and inspected the cake.  We let him touch it…and in his reserved fashion, he slowly warmed up to it, but waited for a spoon before he dug into it.  And in true Brooks form, as soon as he was use to the cake, he demolished it and then had a great time pushing the cake into the floor!

It was great to be surrounded by family and a few friends to celebrate our boy.

And probably the sweetest present that came walking up the sidewalk was carried in and made by Brooks' big cousin Riley.  He knew that Brooks was having a puppy birthday party, so he made him a doghouse, complete with his puppy that he "never ever sleeps with anymore."  Make this momma/aunt cry.  Riley assembled the whole thing by himself, his momma just helped a bit with the paint.

On the night you were born….

"On the night you were born the moon smiled with such wonder that the stars peeked down to see you and the night wind whispered…life will never be the same."  

And well, life certainly hasn't been the same since the night you came to the world.  It's been better, harder, sweeter, funnier, scarier, and so much more.  I am in love with Nancy Tillman books, and that has been our favorite one this year.  I got you "I'd Know You Anywhere, My Love" for your birthday.  

I never typed the story of Brooks and his great entrance into the world.  I worked on this a couple of week ago and I am glad I have finally written it down:

I can't believe it's December again, I feel like it was just last December and I was enjoying all the fun of being 9 months pregnant.  Being pregnant and about to have a baby in December is so special.  It makes you think about Mary, Joseph, the donkey and baby Jesus…and the stable in a whole new way.

I never typed Brooks' birth story and I know with each year parts will become more faded in my mind so I wanted to write it all down.  I think right after he was born I was just too tired and focused on my sweet little bundle to do any documenting about anything other than him.  

How it started:

I had consistently measured a week or two ahead of schedule, but at my 36 week appointment I went in for my first official progress check and I was measuring 39 weeks and dilated to a 2.  The jump to 3 weeks ahead was a bit of a shock and this kick started me into a panic of thinking I was going to have a baby before Christmas.  I think I drove straight to work and started cleaning off my work area and prepping my detailed notes for each of my kids at work.  My friend Julie said "that's how it was with me and then I took forever to go into labor" and that's pretty much what happened with me.  Every week after that appointment I measured close to 40 weeks but I stopped progressing.  My doctor was a little concerned with his size and gave me the option of being induced at 39 1/2 weeks which landed on New Year's Eve.  At 9 months pregnant when they give you an option to get the show on the road..you take it!  (well, I do anyway)  

Night Before:

We had to check in on Sunday night at midnight to be induced that Monday morning.  My sister-in-law Elizabeth and my mom offered to make me dinner that Sunday night of any thing I wanted!  We had breakfast for dinner and I even managed to eat some of it, looking back I have no idea how I did that.  I can't eat when I'm nervous, but I stayed relatively calm.  I remember that evening well and I was wearing Bryan's red long sleeve thermal that he had given me because "it was too big for him" and my stretchy maternity jeans.  Everything just felt tight and I was ready to have my little bundle in my arms not in my stomach any more!  

Hospital:

We came home from my mom's and took our time getting our stuff together and showering/make-uping/hair fixing before we drove to the hospital at midnight.  It was REALLY cold and Bryan dropped me off at the door of the ER because that's the only door you can enter at midnight.  The guy at the ER desk said "we do NOT like pregnant people in the ER, let's get you up to labor and delivery" and he made me sit in a wheel chair and he wheeled me at approximately 100MPH to the labor and delivery floor.  I was feeling big anyway and the foot rest on the chair kept dragging the ground and scraping, not to mention it was a pretty ragged looking wheel chair and I felt like I might smash it to the ground.  I also felt a little like Violet from Willy Wonka being rolled to the juicer or something.  I kept kind of laughing because he was running me through the halls of Washington Regional like I was on fire.  Bryan had a hard time keeping up with us and he's a really fast walker, if that sets the scene for anyone who knows us.  

We checked in and a nurse got me set up in bed and hooked up to monitors and IV.  My IV was really uncomfortable but it eventually either stopped hurting or I was distracted by the contractions that were really rolling with the pitocin they started around 5:00AM.  The nurse did tell me that I went the longest of any one she'd ever seen before calling her to get up and use the restroom.  The truth was I had to go forever, but felt like it was such an ordeal to get unhooked to go, in hindsight, it's their job to help you so I should have just called her sooner.  

Monday morning my doctor came to check me and talk to me about the plan that day.  We had a nurse switch and Regina my soon to be nurse BFF came on duty.  Bryan prayed for us before the day started and I had good cry, and then I put on my game face.  The guy came to do my epidural and was wonderful and wanted to chit chat about Jonesboro and the 501, he and Bryan talked and I gave one word answers.  I wasn't in the mood for chatting, but I appreciate he tried to keep things light.  It was also really rainy and cold on that Monday and I remember looking out the window thinking how surreal it all was.  They kept upping my meds and by lunch time I was to a 5.  I am so thankful that I was comfortable and we had such sweet people to take care of Brooks and I.  I kept telling myself we'd have a baby before dinner…but I think some how I knew the whole time that it wasn't going down like.  Brooks was always very high and all day he kept kicking my ribs and I felt like that was where he wanted to stay.  

Around lunch I treated myself to a red popsicle and that was a mistake.  My doctor said she really wanted to deliver Brooks so they upped meds as much as they could with no change and I got a little sick to my stomach.  She checked me one last time before she left for the day and passed me to the next doctor on call.  Around dinner the new doctor checked me again and called my doctor who said we could keep trying but could possibly still be in the same spot hours from then.  At this point I was ready to just have baby boy out and safe, so we opted for a c-section after 12 hours with no more progress.  

Arrival:

They prepped me for a c-section and off we went.  I got sick to my stomach again on the ride over and the sweet nurse I had all day literally used her bare hands to catch throw up.  If I ever see her again, I will hug her.  Everyone we had was so great and my sweet and my wonderful doctor came back to the hospital to help deliver Brooks.  I didn't process for a couple of months that she came back on New Year's Eve to deliver him, which is so kind.  I was glad to see her familiar face and Brooks came into the world at 6:54PM (or 6:45 if you ask Bryan…there is debate) and weighed 8 lbs, 3 oz and was 20.5"long.  Doctor Hardman said "hey buddy, you are a big boy!" when we was born and I looked over at him and saw the head full of dark hair, which I wasn't expecting, and I loved.  

After a little recovering I got to snuggle my new baby boy and look him over.  It's fortunate and unfortunate all the meds you have with a c-section because it was all a little foggy until the next morning, but we took pictures and the grandparents held him.  I am sure it was late and my mom stayed with Brooks and I that night.  The next morning Bryan came back early and I had some of the most delicious food I felt like I had ever tasted, it had been awhile since dinner on Sunday evening and then we had a day of visitors and getting to know each other.  I still can't get over how undeserving we are of such a beautiful and sweet baby boy.

Tuesday night I asked Susan to stay with me at the hospital and she literally sat up all night long either watching Brooks or holding him.  It was a rougher night for us both, but the sun came up the next morning and we had another wonderful day to love our sweet baby.  

Home:

We stayed Monday night and Tuesday night and came home on Wednesday.  We got little guy dressed in an outfit give to us by his Uncle Chad and Aunt Elizabeth and he wore a hat and booties that Susu and Pa got him.  Dressing him seemed so hard because he was so tiny and I was just so sure I might hurt him.  Bryan drove us home and we walked in the door and had no idea what to do with him.  Bryan sat his car seat down in the entry way while we sat all of our stuff down (it was like moving) and I began my career as momma.  We took him into the living room and held him and then put him in the nap nanny and watched him and then held him some more.  I was a nervous wreck for weeks and had a whole new compassion to other new momma's out there.

One Day Old

One Year Old!

Being your momma is my favorite thing.  

11 months old

You have turned into this little toddler overnight.  When I drew out the number 11 on the chalkboard for your picture I started crying, and I will have to accept that I will be "that mom" meaning the one who cries and celebrates over every milestone.  You have started standing and taking steps, they are so cute and cautious.  You love to cruise around the house and you are literally all over the place and into everything that is NOT a toy.

You have become super opinionated and point, reach, lean, grab for everything.  I have officially dropped you on your head once now...you were sitting in my lap and I was trying to wrestle socks on to your feet and you just leaned over and jumped and out of my arms you went.  Luckily we were sitting and you landed on the rug.  I couldn't even move for several minutes it scared me so badly.  You daddy said that I should have seen it from across the room, he said it was in slow motion!  Yikes!  He also likes to remind me when y'all are wrestling and he's holding you upside down that I am the one who dropped him…i don't really like the upside down stuff you dada does!

Typical Day:
6:30-7:00AM bottle

snack/morning nap

12:00 - lunch time

afternoon nap and bottle

6:00PM dinner

7:30-8:00 bottle and bed time

Your schedule shifts daily depending on the time you wake up.  If you are entertained sometimes you will stay awake longer in the morning and take a really long nap middle of the day and a shorter one in the late afternoon.

Favorites

Foods: you are loving chicken strips, seasoned baked/steamed vegetables, raviolis, spinach/potato bakes, crackers, mum-mums, baby yogurt, puffs, teething cookies and cereal.  i still give you some pureed baby food and you can suck down a pouch of baby food in just a minute, it's funny.  you had purple hull peas at Su-su's and LOVED them.  we are still trying to do mostly organic foods especially produce and meats, but that goes out the window when you consume a plate full of rice/beans at our favorite mexican restaurant or want a little taste of my ginger-ale.

Toys/loves:
Christmas tree lights, ornaments, cords, outlets, cars, push toys, balls…you especially love cars right now and push all the cars Riley passed down to you all over our house.  it's really cute.  you won't sit still for books right now, so sometimes i just sit and read them even though you crawl around while i am doing it.  i am so hopeful to have a book lover on my hands.

Language:
You point and whine/squeal to get what you want and that's hard for me…i am all the time trying to get you to make a nicer sound to request rather than that whiney/fussy business.  i do some signs with you for things and you pretty much push my hands away.  i don't care if you sign or point, just trying to help you have a better way to tell us what you want.  you lean into your daddy and i when new people talk to you, and you are still shy with most new people.  you cry when we leave you at nursery at church but always end up playing by the time we come back for you.  you are saying "mama, dada, bye-bye, ba-ba, fffff, la-la" and I think bye-bye is your first meaningful word.  Susu said after we left you sat waving and saying bye-bye.  You use dada and mama interchangeable for both of us…so I am excited for you to say it and mean it! :)  you have imitated "ba" for ball and "baba" for your bottle a lot lately, so that is fun.

Ear stats:
you managed to get double ear infections two weeks in a row with your tubes.  we did ear drops and antibiotics and went back to the ENT and he cleaned them out a bit.  cleaning the tubes in your ears involved us strapping you a papoose board with a nurse and me holding you.  you recovered really quickly, but you were NOT happy.  i feel like you are going to be getting more teeth soon, you are very drooly and chewing on everything.  we have been out of daycare the end of november and early december with susu here keeping you, so we are feeling well, and i wish it would last!

Weight:
You are still at 20 lbs, and 25th percentile for weight/height.  You have dropped down some in both since you were smaller, so we will see how this levels out later on…I don't care as long as you are healthy sweet boy!

I am so excited to watch you learn and grow and sad that it's going so fast.  We love you so much little buddy.  

10 months old!

Our days:
6:30-7:00 wake up time and bottle, we still sit in our chair and I drink coffee and talk to you while you have your bottle, it's the best time ever!  So nice to just sit and relax in the morning and not be running around.

7:30-7:45 breakfast, you LOVE bananas, waffles, cereal and fruit/oatmeal

8:00 head towards school, our drop off time is usually around 8:15, you are excited to get down and play in the floor or cuddle with one of your teachers, i love that you are loving it.

on days that we are home you like to take a good morning nap and afternoon nap now!  you have started refusing your bottles during the day time, so I am thinking time to make the morning and night bottles bigger.

11:30-ish bottle

12:30-ish lunch  you love crackers, chicken strips, sweet potatoes, pears, etc.

4:00-ish bottle

6:00 dinner, we tried some butternut squash ravioli's this week, and you liked them!  you will also eat a few bites of avocado, but you are not in love!

7:00 bath time and bed time with bottle between 7:30 and 8:00

you use to fall asleep every night with your bottle and rocking, but lately you like to drink your bottle, twist around and stand up in my lap and play with your pacifier.  you like to share it with me while grabbing for the curtains and smiling.  so funny, we love watching your personality come out more everyday!

"We don't yike Santa!"

Brooks' grandparents requested a picture of all their grandkids with Santa.  Off to see Santa we went...we really talked it up with our little wild card, Lena Beth…"Santa is nice, he will ask you want for Christmas" blah, blah…  

We arrive, things are looking ok, we go in and the Santa was nice, maybe a bit too nice, but didn't really mesh well with Lena Beth or with my son who doesn't want to be tickled or touched by a giant red stranger.  If looks could have taken Santa out….Brooks would have taken him down.  He was so serious, and I struggled even handing him over to sit on his lap since he wanted NOTHING to do with him…and walking in Lena Beth yells "I don't YIKE SANTA!"

Brooks starting to cry and the blue sucker bribe is still working on Lena Beth…and Riley smiling. 

Lena Beth decides she can cry louder than Brooks…and no sucker is worth being happy on Santa's lap.

Riley…still smiling.

Lena Beth with one arm up!

And the finale, Brooks still crying, Riley still smiling, and Lena Beth with BOTH hands up!

Merry Christmas!

Our fall...

This is my favorite time of year.  When the leaves start changing around Fayetteville and I see mums and pumpkins, I get really excited.  I've treated myself to a few pumpkin lattes and busted out the boots and scarves to make it official.

We have had some great weather, and played in the backyard.  I have joked that a blanket in the yard is like an invisible fence for Brooks.  He does not like the grass, so he won't leave the blanket.  It's great.


Our little fella also entered fall with ear infections that have been recurrent since August when he started daycare.  We did 3 rounds of oral antibiotics, and two rounds of a series of 3 antibiotic shots (just to do the math for you, that 6 shots in 2 weeks).  By the time he got the last shot he was using his free leg to push the nurse away.  I hated it for him, but he was a trooper and recovered quickly.  All of those shots did not make his ears better so we headed to the ENT.  I tried my best to avoid getting tubes, but Brooks got them Friday, October 11th.  Since then he has pretty much been able to sleep through the night with out crying, I am so thankful he feels better!  I also feel like God used taking my baby to a hospital to make my heart even softer for those parents who frequent hospitals with their children.

My favorite part of the morning, when he was back in our arms and recovering!  I am so thankful to have medical care that we need for Brooks available to us.  Hard to think about those that don't.  

We had a sweet morning at the pumpkin patch, our buddy Sadler met us there.  These two had a great time checking out all the pumpkins.  

 I still have to remind myself that my lifelong best friend and I have sweet boys 2 weeks apart, such a blessing.  

 He doesn't lay still often, but when he does, it's sweet stuff.  

And I don't really think about October any more with out thinking about Ukraine. Two years ago I spent two weeks there in October, and it was one of the most special times of my life.  It was my no means an "easy" two weeks, but a lot of good stuff isn't.  

 I have this picture framed in my kitchen..I know the view of this road is looking out from the orphanage and I love having it in my kitchen. 

"I'm so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers." -L.M. Montgomery

8.5 months

Little man has done some big things over the past month, here's the run down

-You are loving your new ability to move around and explore, you started officially crawling on all fours Friday evening, September 13th, and by the next morning, you couldn't be slowed down.   You love outlets, cords, knobs, shoes, strings and basically everything that is NOT a toy.

-You will turn a toy over and inspect every part of it while you play.
-If we hold you, you will push away with your legs, and climb up us as high as we will let you.  You also love to be upside down.

-You have had the two bottom teeth and in the past week your central/lateral incisors have come through on the top left, and looks like the other two on the opposite side are not far behind.
-You have been a champ through fevers, 3 rounds of antibiotics, and multiple ear infections and all of those teeth coming in since starting daycare in August...sleeping has been hit or miss, but snuggling more is always sweet.  Even at 2:00AM....once i am coherent
-You consistently squeal, cough, and say "buh-buh" and "dah-dah" and I heard "mah-mah" for the first time in awhile this evening.
-You have a great pincer grasp and love to feed yourself puffs, yogurt melts, and tiny pieces of bread/crackers.  you would probably love all table food, i am dicing bananas/avocados for you..we may try some other stuff this week

-You make the sweetest little pointer finger to point to pictures in books, makes my speech-path momma heart happy.
-You are so sweet and love to laugh...and also have this really strong personality when you have your mind set to something.  I'm honestly a little nervous about how exactly to handle all of this strong will!
-You had school pictures, and apparently you were not amused...

-You watch people and love to just take it all in, you still like some warm up time with most people, but occasionally you will just "take to" someone new, and go right to them.  It doesn't happen super often, but it's cute when it does!

-You get really excited and make the cutest noises when you get excited.
-You want to be free on the floor or in our arms, it's very offensive to you to be put into a container of any sort (car seat, high chair, pack-n-play, exersaucer, etc.).
-If you want don't want to go into your car seat, you can put up a good enough fight that I am sweating by the time you are buckled.  you have managed on several occasions to turn yourself completely over and attempted to crawl out.

keepin' it real. and proof to show you daddy, but he's experienced your car seat fit now though

(i feel myself becoming more humble by the second, especially as my 8 month old can throw a fit big enough to remove himself from the car seat in the parking lot of daycare...i have 30 years on him and over 100+ pounds..how is that possible?!?)

-you reach for us to pick you up and reach for us to get you if someone else is holding you, i love it.
-you will hold tight to my clothes if you don't want to be set down or handed to someone
-you love to be "scared" when we hide and jump out, you gasp and then laugh hysterically, you did not get this from me.
-i can not wear jewelry or you grab it so tightly i feel i will break it or hurt your hand to it loosen it, you actually grab for anything we have in our hands..even toothbrushes.

-you still have to be rocked to sleep, but have fallen asleep at daycare on your own a handful of times, i love rocking you, it's a sweet time

A typical work day/day care day:

6:30-7:00 cereal/fruit and 6-7 ounce bottle, we still sit in our rocking chair and cuddle for our morning bottle and look out the window while i drink my coffee...the best part of my day!  we also try to read some books and play in the floor a little before we head out for the day
8:00-8:30 daycare drop off, depends on the day
mid-morning nap (a good day is 1.5 hours..sometimes it's 20 minutes)
11:00 6 oz bottle
12:00-ish fruit/veggie
afternoon nap (a good day is 2 hours...most of the time, it's 30 minutes here and there)
3:00 6 oz bottle
3:30 snack - puffs/yogurt melts
6:00 dinner - veggies/fruits and usually a small 4 oz bottle
after dinner we play, take our bath, etc.
7:30-8:00 - 6 oz bottle and beddie-bye

You wear size 3 diapers, definitely filling out 9-12 month clothing!  At your last doctor's appointment you were 50% for height and down to 25% for weight (19 lbs), this was after being sick for 2 solid weeks beforehand, so our next appointment, I am sure you'll beef back up!  You are still holding strong with your 90% head circumference.